What I Would Tell My High School Self

Danielle Rella, a student at Sacred Heart University, is a new member of the Fairfield HamletHub family, and will be a regular contributing writer going forward. She offers this first piece -- a reflection on high school and what she would have done differently had she had the wisdom she has since gained...

Growing up is a part of life and as you mature, you realize that all the problems you thought were the end of the world in high school were not very significant after all. During that time, you often follow what you think is “cool” and typically because of something you see in movies and on television. Looking back, this is the advice I would give to the students still in high school.

1. Friendships. Throughout high school, friendships form and dissolve. It wasn’t until I entered my junior year of high school that I realized who my true friends were. Up until then, I spent so much time trying to “fit in” and gain a huge group of friends, and now I constantly ask myself “WHY?” If I had spent more time studying and less time on the "friend drama", I would likely have had straight A’s.
2. Relationships. In high school, you think relationships are everything. There are always stories about high school sweethearts and falling in love, and there's so much related drama. Focus on yourself instead of worrying about how to make a boy like you, what to wear, the makeup, the perfume, etc. Stop trying to impress other people, and impress yourself. In short, always be yourself and the rest will fall into place.
3. Clothes. Fashion is constantly a main topic in society, but it was even worse in high school. When I got to college, I realized that it was okay to not always be in Abercrombie or PINK and acceptable to be in lesser known brand names, and still look great. In high school, dressing up is like a red carpet event, with people asking, “Who are you wearing?” In college, no one cares about who you are wearing but what you are wearing. If you’re wearing a cute outfit, you’re complimented and no one cares if you got the outfit at Neiman Marcus or TJ Maxx.
4. Gossip. Why did I waste so much time talking about people and their lives when it didn’t affect me? When I got to college and had put distance between myself and high school, I realized that what I thought were the HUGE things were now the smallest things in my life. I hate the fact that high school involves everyone talking about everyone else. Yes, gossip will always be a part of "girl world" but, in college, if it doesn’t affect you, it’s not worth even having the conversation. Growing up, you realize that talking about people who no longer have a large impact on your life says more about you than it does about them.
5. Grades. Obviously grades are a huge part of high school, but they were always last on my priorities list. I tended to push off my homework and studying to the very end of my day, and then just do the minimum amount of work necessary. If I could do it all over again, grades would be at the top of my list instead of the dram and other distracting issues that high school entailed.