As the kids are settling back into school, I have a message for all you moms out there! “It’s Mom-Time!”: time to think about what you need to do, for YOURSELF, in this coming year.
Every September I meet moms who confess they are neglecting themselves or have lost their sense of identity. Some even say they don’t know what they enjoy any longer or can’t remember the last time they really had fun. I have had people tell me that they that nurturing themselves feels selfish and egocentric. Well let me tell you nothing could be further from the truth. You see in order to be a great mom, a loving wife or partner, a committed employee or volunteer you MUST look after yourself. A depressed, stressed, burnt-out, bored, unfulfilled woman can not shine her light in the world.
6 steps to creating the fabulous, balanced life you deserve
Step 1. Acknowledge that you deserve to be happy, healthy and fulfilled in your life. Notice any “crooked” thoughts such as “I don’t deserve…”, “I haven’t got time to … for myself”, “I’ll do that when the kids have left home”. Challenge these thoughts and turn them into a positive thought “I work hard for my family, I deserve to be happy”, “nurturing myself will ultimately help my family” and “life’s too short, let’s do this today”.
Step 2: Reconnect with your authentic self, who you are at your core, free from all assumptions. Reflect on your perspective on your past, present and future, your core values, passions, what you needs in life in order to be happy, your sense of purpose, patterns of thinking, strengths and weaknesses. If you fail to do this step, you may find yourself achieving your goals and still feeling that something is missing.
Step 3: With the information from step 2 in mind, decide what you really want from life. What specifically will make YOU more happy, healthy, successful and feel abundant? Get very clear on what these things or goals are.
Step 4: Plan change strategically. This includes setting specific, measurable and realistic goals, identifying barriers to change in advance to limit self sabotage, building a support team around you and planning rewards for success, to help motivate you.
Step 5: Become a Peak Performer in all you do. Have you heard the proverb “if a job is worth doing, it’s worth doing well”? Becoming a peak performer can save you time, energy and money. To become a peak performer you must improve your physical health, your mental health and your ability to hyperfocus on you the tasks in hand.
Step 6: Get help and support. We humans are social beings, we need other people to thrive. You may want to reach out to a friend or family member or beyond. Many women feel that they don’t want to burden their loved ones with their woes and feel that alone they can’t make progress. This is where an expert coach or health professional comes in. They can offer non-judgemental advice, accountability, a shoulder to cry on and strategies that save them time, energy and a lot of mistakes.
Seize the moment! Now is the time to focus on creating the happy, healthy, abundant life you deserve. I promise you, you won’t regret it!