Last night, I had a few free minutes while I waited for dinner to finish cooking. I grabbed the book that I can't put down right now (a young adult series) with the plan to read a few pages while I waited. I dove in and found myself in the middle of my kitchen sobbing. One of the key characters in the story was killed.
I was furious and devastated at the same time. I immediately texted a friend who had also read this series and proceeded to type furiously the myriad emotions I was feeling. I pulled myself together to serve dinner but had to finish reading the book last night to see how the story could possibly continue.
I am reading this series before my children, and after this character died, one of my first thoughts was, "I don't want my children to read this and be sad." As I kept reading, I realized they need to read this because sometimes life is sad. Sometimes bad things happen. As much as I may wish to shield them from every sad thing in life, I can't. I kept reading and saw how the main character was devastated by this loss, but she kept going. I want my children to see this.
As young readers, we learn from the characters in our favorite books. We learn how they deal with challenges, pain, success, etc. We see how things may go wrong if they handle situations the wrong way. These are learning experiences. Just like the learning experiences my children experience by making mistakes, by making poor choices, by making the right choices. They keep the memories from those events and draw on them when faced with future challenges. Characters in books give young readers more opportunities to learn, more memories to draw on when they are faced with a similar challenge in their own lives.
While I may wish to spare my children from sadness, I need to give them the tools to be prepared for when something sad or upsetting or painful happens to them. Seeing characters they know and love go through challenges reminds them that others face difficulties too. Sometimes when life is difficult, we need a friend who understands, and sometimes the one friend we can find who gets it lives inside the pages of a really good book. The shared experience with a friend (human or fictional) can give us a sense of comfort. So while I am still sad this character died, I want my children to see how the main character deals with her grief while continuing on her journey in this series.
R