Better Than Before by Gretchen Rubin: Book Review

As a neuroscience nerd, I am fascinated by the subject of habits. Those things we do everyday with little conscious effort, that save us time, energy and attention. Imagine your life if you had to consciously decide, plan and focus on activities such as brushing your teeth, taking a shower and getting up in the morning! Phew, life would be so exhausting that we’d have little time to do anything interesting or useful. Gretchen Ruben’s fascinating 2015 book “Better Than Before: What I Learned About Making and Breaking Habits--to Sleep More, Quit Sugar, Procrastinate Less, and Generally Build a Happier Life” helps us better understand habits and harness their power to make important changes in our lives.

In this book, Ruben outlines 21 strategies for adding more helpful habits to your life. These strategies are based on the premise that because we humans are all so different we need different strategies to create new habits, and this process begins with improving our self-knowledge of what type of habit person we are. She begins with the four habit tendencies that  people fall loosely into: upholders, questioners, obligers and rebels. And goes on to describe four distinctions, for example are you a marathoner or sprinter? an under-buyer or an over-buyer? a finisher or an opener? a novelty-lover or familiarity lover? Armed with this new self knowledge we move onto building pillars and taking action towards our new habits. She goes on to give strategies for getting started, and preparing for obstacles. I had many moments of thinking “oh my, she just described me!” My biggest AHA moment was when she explained that by making something, such as exercise into a habit, you take away the decision making and thus reduce the risk of inaction or procrastination. You change from someone who debates whether to exercise, what time to go, which class to take, into someone who just gets on with exercising because that’s what you do! My favorite quote from the book was about creating “everyday life in Utopia” a phrase penned by her daughter which suggests that if we use these strategies we can begin to create a more joyful life using habits, that we can live our own Utopia everyday. I love that idea!

This book is a great addition to the literature on habits which includes “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg and Stephen Covey’s series that began with “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People”.  It is filled with research, strategies and stories. I even felt like I got to know Rubin’s extended family! At times I would drift into thinking that I was very different from the author and therefore her techniques might not work for me, but was reassured by her research and explanations of human diversity, that it could work for almost anyone. My only criticism was that I was left wanting more summaries and explicit instruction: “do this… and then do that” but this may be due to my personal style preference for personal development book. If you want to open up more time in your day for the people and things that really matter, I highly recommend you read “Better Than Before: What I Learned About Making and Breaking Habits--to Sleep More, Quit Sugar, Procrastinate Less, and Generally Build a Happier Life” by Gretchen Ruben.

About the blogger

Dr Leonaura Rhodes is a physician turned author, health and wellness blogger, corporate wellness trainer and life coach. She is author of “Beyond Soccer Mom: strategies for a fabulous balanced life” a comprehensive guide to creating a thriving life. 

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