Turn Shyness into Confidence: Top Three Tips

*Part 3: Turn Shyness into Confidence: Top Three Tips

Part 1 discussed why it pays to know what causes shyness. Part 2 considered why overcoming shyness helps with job interviews, networking and personal relationships. This installment reveals how to grow your confidence.

Top Three Tips:

1. Examine what you value and how you add value

2. Share your talents and interests with others

3. Seek a mentor

Why does examining your values matter? Once you deeply understand what makes you tick you will pursue hobbies and careers that align better with what you love. This increases happiness and confidence. In turn, sharing your talents and skills will reveal how you bring value to others. For example, a person who loves educating people can make a wonderful teacher or trainer. An animal lover who excels at science and data could make a terrific veterinarian.

Your values can change over time, so examining them frequently helps keep you honest with yourself. I entered college with a dream to become a professional musician, but graduated with a desire to teach English abroad. I realized I wanted to engage people in conversation instead of perform music for them. I’ve always valued making a difference for people. My mentors often say that serving others is a powerful way to increase your happiness and fulfillment.

Sharing your talents and passions with family and friends, teachers and classmates helps you make connections with potential new friends, romantic partners and mentors. You will also become accustomed to talking about your gifts, which makes performing and speaking in public much easier. Each new connection can open doors to more ways to serve others and grow your life experience and confidence.

As a talented musician in school, I developed a following of classmates and teachers, especially after performing in the 8th and 9th grade talent shows. After all, these performances changed my bullies’ perceptions of me and stopped their bullying altogether! Later, I excelled at both written communication and public speaking. In all cases, I was thrilled to be able to impact others and this in turn helped shape my identity and build my confidence.

Finding Good mentors can be difficult, but in your hobbies or work they are essential in teaching invaluable skills and guiding you through self doubt and tough times. My music teachers helped me progress faster through their wisdom and experience. An older friend became like a big brother and helped me develop strong social skills and coached me on how to improve them. I Could now go to parties, introduce myself fearlessly and spark engaging conversations while making new friends easily.

Saying goodbye to shy doesn’t happen overnight, but developing confidence-building skills and practicing them with discipline will yield results overtime. Be sure to connect with a mentor who can help you grow faster!


Oscar Romero is Founder and President of OscarRomeroSpeaks, providing solutions for shy or socially anxious people to say goodbye to being shy in order to approach professional and social situations confidently and realize their dreams.

He lives in Bethel, CT. To learn more about shedding shyness click https://www.oscarromerospeaks.com/

*This article is Part three of a three part series. 

Part 1- What Causes Shyness and Why Should You Care 

Part 2 -Say Goodbye to Your Shy. Top Three Reasons Why!

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Submitted by New Fairfield, CT

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